Perhaps I Do.6:09:00 PM
Sometimes, I wonder why I don't say what I'm really thinking, don't speak the words that fill my mind. I know, this sounds absurd coming from the impulsive writer but every time I write something, every time I post something, part of my soul drifts away, its no longer my responsibility, and I have no control over how it is taken. I'm vulnerable for a moment. And it is an incredibly brief and heart-wrenching moment. I was talking to an old friend, an amazing musician and he told me about recent philosophies he'd read. He told me that its important to put out everything, even if we're not sure about it, even if its hard, its important to be open with every thought, every thing you do (music, painting, writing), at least this is how I took it. We're often selective in our souls and what we'll allow others to see of it, but why? Because we're nervous, we're afraid to be rejected by people who in reality are no greater than we are. We are afraid of rejection. Anything you perform in, anything you say, everything you do, is up for rejection and you will be rejected time and time again. But as my favorite Spanish proverb says "a friend to everyone is a friend to no one." You have never and will never be able to please everyone, be accepted by everyone, or be in complete agreement with everyone person you come across. Rejection is no more than opinion and you cannot expect others to reserve theirs anymore than you can reserve your own. I know, when you put your whole soul out there on a silver platter for the world to see, the intimidation is significant. However, the rewards of being open and free with your thoughts are unmistakable because it is not until you share your thoughts that you discover what you actually think.